I’m a Darn(ing) Superstar. On Crack Rocks. With too much sock yarn.

Since I am currently feeling like crap with yet another cold and few medications that I’m allowed to take for it, I am warning you ahead of time about my possible incoherence and / or exceptional whining in this post. No, actually, I don’t feel too whiny, but my brain does feel fuzzy. Need a recent example? My husband just called to ask me what I would like for dinner. I said I just want Jell-O. He asked me what flavor… I said, “Red.” Duh.

Here we go, picture parade…

1. The Crack Rocks.

I’ve eaten two bags of these sinister, sugary sweeties in two weeks. TWO BAGS. One for each butt cheek.

My husband has been officially forbidden to buy this or any other candy substitute, as I currently lack the ability to control my arm’s insistence on propelling these into my mouth at warp speed.

(The pink watermelon ones are my favorite. Yum!)

2. The Sock Stash.
I have knit one and a half pairs of socks (see below for the first half of the second pair). That’s it. The first was Thuja in Artyarns Merino with a size 6 needle; the first sock of the second pair is a Jaywalker in Claudia Handpainted with a size 1 needle. The length of time it has taken me to make this one Jaywalker rivals that of the HP Scarf of Doom. The idea was to make the Jaywalkers and see whether I even like knitting with teensy yarn on teensy needles.


So that explains why I have enough yarn to make ten more pairs of socks with teensy yarn on teensy needles (there’s only enough for nine in the picture, but another skein of Zen Yarn Garden is currently on its way from Canada to my mailbox. I had to – it was pretty!). And why I attempted but failed to buy more SweetGeorgia from The Sweet Sheep yesterday morning. Wait… I can explain! SweetGeorgia is going on hiatus, and The Sweet Sheep’s dozen or so skeins were all that was left. Half of the chum was released for the yarn sharks on Friday afternoon, and the rest on Saturday morning. I already have some SweetGeorgia Superwash Sock, but apparently, I’m GREEDY and not good at sharing with the havenots (I wanted the green one. Hej. Light and bright, with some yellow and blue…mmmmm.). But – not as greedy as whoever nabbed it from my cart while I was filling out the shipping information form (Damn! Fatal strategical error. I hadn’t given a thought as to whether or not the site required new customer registration while I was sitting here from 7:55 to 8:00 hitting “refresh.” Guess the best yarn wh0re won…this time. Muahahahaha!).

I put it in my cart at 8:00 A.M., literally the minute it became available on the site.

At 8:02 A.M., IT WAS GONE. Every single skein of SG was gone from the site in two little minutes. It was a feeding frenzy. It was a little scary, I’m not going to lie.

(Pictured above: Koigu KPM #1016; Cherry Tree Hill Supersock in Wild Cherry and Water Potluck; Interlacements Tiny Toes in Turkish Carpet; Socks that Rock in Love-in-Idleness, Alina and Rooster Rock; Zen Yarn Garden Superwash in Orange Creamsicle; and SweetGeorgia Superwash in Berry. I don’t think the SweetGeorgia Speed Demon in Honey Fig and the Interlacements Toasty Toes in Reds Plus should count against me because of their heavier gauge.)

3. Jaywalker #1 and the Darned Hole.
(Pictured here with a mini Mr. Potato Head inside as a makeshift “darning egg” – he’s not just a pretty face.)

I finished this sock yesterday morning, before my cold became a deluge dripping from my nose (Wow, that’s pretty gross. Sorry.). Instead of fixing this hole when I saw it, despite having received sound how-to advice for the repair, I wimped out. I threaded a piece of evidence that I am a chickenshit string through the stitches that were just hanging out so that it wouldn’t unravel further and decided to just finish the sock first, since frogging and starting over, after all that work, was too painful to even consider. It took me until this morning to scrounge up the nerve to finally attempt a fix. And I waited until my little boy and husband were out shopping so that I could stare calmly into the abyss, without distraction. I might have ripped someone’s head off… The tiny stitches, coupled with the fact that I don’t know the first thing about darning or sewing, made me very nervous. But – it’s my first itsy bitsy gauge sock. It took me forever to finish it. Darn it (hehe), there’s nothing to lose by trying, and everything to gain – like, a sock I can actually wear.

I was told to sew it shut; alternatively, I was told to duplicate stitch over it. So… I did both, in that order, as best I could. The hole was about three stitches wide and two rows high. Here’s the result of my efforts.

You can see, hopefully, some mild, general wonkiness above my finger in this photo. It’s a bit puffy, like a little mini-goiter on the side of the sock, but I think it’s saved since it’s not in an area that should receive much / any wear, and that’s the important part. Nobody (I think?) will ever notice, unless they are caressing my leg when I’m wearing it, and, well… that would be interesting.

I’m hoping that Jaywalker #2 will take much less time, since I now have numbers of rows to work toward for each section – so it will be 69 rows for the foot, rather than infinity times x number of stitches. I’m mentally challenged that way, I guess – I need finite numbers. It makes me feel better.

4. Jaywalker: A Mug Shot.

I think her partner in crime will have to wait at least a day or two to get started, since I don’t relish the idea of teensy anything when I feel so crappy. And anyway, I’m behind on my washcloth making for the April Showers KAL at Get Stitchy, not to mention the Clapotis, or the Mitered blanket I’ve barely started… I’m kind of behind on my life in general, actually. How does that happen?!

This entry was published on April 23, 2007 at 12:05 am and is filed under General (In)sanity, Knitting. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

2 thoughts on “I’m a Darn(ing) Superstar. On Crack Rocks. With too much sock yarn.

  1. Cheryl on said:

    Beautiful sock and wow, great darning job!! Seriously, you can barely see it when you actually look for it. When it’s on your foot I’m sure no one will be able to tell. Hope you’re feeling better by now. It stinks getting sick when you’re pregnant because you just can’t take ANYthing. My advice: cast on sock #2 RIGHT NOW. Immediately. The longer you wait, the harder it will be. And remember: this is supposed to be FUN!!!!!
    Love ya-

  2. April on said:

    I know this is an old post, but I ahd to stop on the merry-go-round of Lime N Violet stalkers ring to say that RED is my favorite flavor of Jello, TOO. Red is also my favorite flavor of Koolaid!

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